What I'm thankful for, 2015

1. A daughter who is happy and healthy

2. Everyone else in my family, blood-related and otherwise.

3. Friends, new and old 

4.  Ayahuasca and the things it has shown me and all it will show me in thefuture 

5. A job that doesn't give me anxiety 

6. People who let me do their hair in the kitchen because my job doesn't pay very much

7. A car that gets me from point A to point B

8. A place of my own to live that is safe and adorable 

9. My kidney recipient for turning my world upside down and showing me what true courage and freedom can be

10. Adventure

This Thanksgiving is completely different than any I have ever had before. I was supposed to spend it with a friend, but I caught a cold and spent the day (mostly) alone. Other than the sniffling and stuff, it was one the best holidays I've ever had. I knew my kid was with her dad's family, eating turkey and running around with her cousins. I didn't have to entertain anyone or worry about what they wanted to eat or do all day.  I could just fix myself some food, sit on the couch, watch tv, read, write, and be by myself.  For the first time in years, I got to spend Thanksgiving thinking about the things I am thankful for. Like really thankful for. Like the fact that I was born a human in this time period in this country. It is a miracle that my body came to be formed at all, especially in a place and time where I don't have to worry about scarlet fever or gential mutilation, and isn't that what the holidays are really about?

I don't know if I would have appreciated my own company as much in the past, but it's pretty nice. Plus, as things change, as life goes on, I know that alone time may not always be so easy to come by. Spending this next summer out of state and living out of my car is probably one of the most exciting things I have to look forward to, but in the meantime, I'm going to appreciate this bathtub while I have it. And yes, I may or may not be typing this on my phone while in the bathtub. My only regret is not bringing a bowl of leftover mashed potatoes in here as well...

I hope that your Thanksgiving is filled with love and gratitude, whether you are surrounded my family or whether you are spending it alone. Either way, I hope you feel peaceful and free and genuinely happy.